The more I know, the more I know I don't know.

A friend wrote the following to me after I sent her an essay written from a developer friend who compares the universe to a gaming loop & that everything is conscious. 

'From a practical viewpoint: believing in one's own agency is essential, as it hugely changes behaviour'. This line inspired a stream of consciousness as I toyed with the concepts of creation, agency, the self, beliefs, consciousness & human nature.
See here for Nikki Durkin's fascinating writing & philosophical diatribe on the nature of reality.

I know nothing.
The more I know, the more I know I don't know.
I can get closer to the truth, but I can't ever reach it while being separate from the universal consciousness.
The only time 'I' might know for sure, is when there is no 'I'. There is just all. All and nothing all at once. When I am everything again. So currently, 'I' I have no beliefs, just best guesses & working models which are ever changing.

In a way, it's quite liberating & awe inspiring to feel connected to something much bigger than yourself. Something that you can't fully comprehend.
I guess all I'm certain of is that I am. I am being. I am doing. I am living. I am breathing. I am conscious. I am having an experience & I am enjoying it. I'm learning & growing more conscious by the day. Developing my understanding of my self, others & the whole. As well as the interconnection between these three & the divine three. Of spirit, creator & creation.

The mechanism of action of how exactly that happens is beyond my comprehension. I can see it's a beautiful & convincing illusion. I can see self similar patterns in the macro & the micro. I can see guiding principles. I can see it's all energy. The matter is all energy. We don't even perceive reality directly.

I can imagine why the universe might want to experience itself. If it is all, then it is nothing. I can experience how I can create universes & characters in my dreams nightly. All the characters in my dream think they are separate, yet they originate from the same mind. They reflect something about me but are not me.
Now imagine a mind much more powerful than yours or mine. Instead of running 8-18 simultaneously interacting characters, which is already energetically intensive, it can run 8-800+BN. It could create our universe & many others concurrently.

We are possibly in the dream of a omnipresent, omnipotent & omniscient superconsciousness or God if you will. This would mean everything from the characters, down to the blade of grass is made of thought. If so, everything is conscious. Everything is divine, interconnected & reflective of the nature of the superconsciousness.

I have an experience of agency, yet I'm humble enough to know it could be a complete illusion. There are countless variables beyond my control so all I can control is my reaction to them. I can also imagine & create more of what I want through my thoughts, words & actions. My choices are limited by my hardware & the nature of reality. Yet my imagination is unlimited.

In systems thinking, if you want to understand the nature of a complex system you look at behaviour over time. Actual behaviour & actions over time are most indicative of the nature of a complex system. Let's look at the behaviour of the universe over time. From a single celled bacteria, over billions of years, we see life as we now see it. We see our brain emerge. Mycellium networks. Music. Language. Art. Philosophy...And even Octopus!

That is a clue to the guiding force & nature of nature. With unlimited possibilities, choices & possible interactions you need guiding principles. These guiding principles guide every atom, cell, individual & natural systems.
If you are the trick of a magician. Yet you only exist because of the magician, however much control it seems you have, then how much agency do you have?
Yet at the same time, the magician couldn't experience itself to be a magician without the ability to perform magic. The magician & the rabbit both need each other. A true magician creates more magicians. Just like a true teacher creates more teachers.

Sometimes one might create magic tricks which you don't know the full results of. Maybe you run a few tricks concurrently & change a variable & see what happens.

If it wants to experience the concept of a successful vs unsuccessful trick, it needs to create the possibility for both. Is there good without evil on a spectrum of emotional frequency? Is a righteous choice truly righteous if you didn't have the ability to make a non-righteous choice in your eyes? Polarities create opportunities for learning, growth & understanding. For in order to know yourself, sometimes you need to experience that which you are not.

Understanding your limitations doesn't limit your power. It increases it by moving you closer towards the magic & the source of life itself.

If knowledge is power, then knowing nothing is wisdom.

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